RDT Reviews Space Jam (1996)

Released: November 15, 1996
First Seen: In Theaters (Near Release Date)

Last Watch: Amazon Prime Video

Similar to the Mortal Kombat film, we need to figure out what Space Jam is looking to accomplish.  What we have here is a kids’ film with the Looney Tunes and Michael Jordan. Some decent comedy and a simple story would make Space Jam a success. For the most part that’s what we get, although it’s far from perfect.

The good news for Space Jam is that it doesn’t try to do anything crazy. Our story is simple. Mr. Swackhammer (one of those characters that had to be created for Danny Devito) needs new attractions for Moron Mountain and learns of the Looney Tunes. He sends his alien minions to capture the Looney Tunes to be that attraction. The Tunes come up with a way to the defend themselves. Since the aliens are diminutive in stature, the Tunes challenge them to a basketball game. The aliens steal the powers of several NBA stars and become huge monsters (The Monstars), and the Tunes answer by kidnapping Michael Jordan. It isn’t a complicated story and the film delivers this.

A genius plan…

Your mileage will vary with the humor in this film. The Looney Tunes do seem toned down overall but that makes sense. Most jokes are as kid friendly as possible and while the slapstick is there, you can’t go overboard here. Some of the jokes are absolute misses (Porky Pig claiming he wet himself, for example) but overall, I do find the Looney Tunes either funny or just non-offensive. You’re either going to find Daffy Duck funny or insufferable. I found him funny. Bugs is funny at some moments too.  As a bonus, the NBA players who lose their talent also provide some good humor. Charles Barkley specifically looked to be taking Space Jam much more seriously than anyone else.

The main issue of the film mostly revolves around Michael Jordan. I don’t think Jordan’s necessarily to blame, but knowing the man now and comparing him to the character he is in Space Jam is a bit nauseating. On the film side, Jordan does poke fun at it in the film at times (upon being asked if everyone was mad at him striking out in a minor league baseball game, Jordan replies with “it’s worse, everyone was really nice about it”). We get shown that Jordan has a perfect family and everyone in the world loves him and he’s level headed and a leader in all situations and blah blah blah. It just makes for a boring character who’s there to save the day at the end. The closest thing to a conflict Jordan has in the film is at the very end, when he decides to return to basketball to see if he still “has it”. There’s also the side issue of anything involving Michael Jordan, which is that it turns into a commercial.  Stan, Jordan’s publicist in the film (and played by Wayne Knight, which is something else where your mileage will vary) actually has the following line in the film: “C’mon, Michael! It’s game time! Get your Hanes on, lace up your Nikes, grab your Wheaties and your Gatorade, and we’ll pick up a Big Mac on the way to the ballpark.”

Some other odds and ends before we cover the big game at the end. Bill Murray has a weird and completely unnecessary side story where he thinks he can be a NBA player. Larry Bird is pretty funny as well and we get a little of that legendary trash talk. Lola Bunny was added as a new character, but was an oddly sexualized female bunny. But she did become a female basketball icon for a while so I guess that worked? I don’t recall how the film looked back when it came out, but watching it on Amazon Prime Video HD I must say the film animation looks fantastic. The soundtrack is incredible as well. Sure, some songs are hard to listen to now because of who sang them (looking at you R. Kelly). The Space Jam theme though is right up there with the Mortal Kombat theme for best movie music of the 90s though.

Can Michael pull this one out?

As for the big game, it’s fine for what it is. Just some whacky fun with a comeback story attached (and a joke about steroids?). The gags during the Looney Tunes’ comeback are fun enough. Just harmless fun for the most part. MJ of course hits the winning basketball (after upping the stakes…which is hilarious knowing MJ) and everyone lives happily ever after.

Best Scene: The intro with the Space Jam theme is fantastic.

Worst Scene: Porky Pig saying he wet himself is eye-rolling at best.

Final Thoughts: Space Jam is a simple and fun 90 minutes. It’s not perfect, but it doesn’t try to be either. And the MJ-Looney Tunes combo made big money so it’s all good.

Grade: B-

RDT Reviews Mortal Kombat (1995) and Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)

Coming off the heels of atrocious The Super Mario Bros. Movie, the video game movie business was already in trouble. The Mortal Kombat series had already seen controversy in the video game industry due to it’s ridiculous level of violence (which would spawn the Entertainment Software Rating Board). So how the heck was a Mortal Kombat movie going to work? Well, we ultimately got two of them.

Released: August 18, 1995
First Seen: In Theaters (Near Release Date)

Last Watch: Netflix

Right away we need to set some boundaries and make an exception. In order for video game films to work the film itself doesn’t necessarily need to be great as a film. It can have story issues, weakish plots, etc. as long as it caters enough to the audience of the gaming series. This is what The Super Mario Bros. Movie failed to do. Mario attempted to give us an in-depth story (which failed on it’s own merits) and then strayed way too far away from what made the Super Mario Bros. gaming franchise fun.

For Mortal Kombat in 1995, I think of three things: a fighting game, ridiculous gore and violence and a diverse cast of characters that actually have interesting backstories.  The first question mark is the ridiculous gore and violence. There was just no way that was going to make it into this movie with it being rated R. And if you listen to some reviewers on Youtube now, that’s where a lot of their disappointment lies. Hey I get it, but a rated R video game movie in 1995 just wasn’t going to make any money. The storyline we’ll get to later the review, but it’s fine for what it is. Lastly, we get more than enough fighting scenes that perhaps the film can almost be judged for that alone (and it’s what tips the movie into a positive direction).

An iconic logo.

Mortal Kombat’s story is simple and it works for the film. Three of Earth’s warriors must stop the evil Shang Tsung and his warriors from winning a 10th straight Mortal Kombat tournament. If they fail to do so, Tsung and Outworld take over the Earth. The three warriors, Liu Kang, Sonya Blade and Johnny Cage all have their own issue to face (Kang’s out for revenge as Tsung killed his older brother, Blade is a police officer looking for a criminal, Kano, who killed a former partner of hers, and Cage is a movie star that everyone thinks is a fake, so he’s out to prove he’s the real deal) and Raiden, the Elder Thunder God, helps them face these issues. That’s all you need to know to get to the conclusion of this story. It’s simplicity will never win an Oscar, but it’s a story that’s easy to follow and you know where the endgame is.

What Mortal Kombat does well is that it makes it’s characters feel like big deals. Right from the get-go we see what Shang Tsung is all about. We get introductions to Kang, Blade and Cage. In a nice surprise Liu Kang isn’t a one dimensional “destiny” character, he in fact doesn’t believe in all this stuff and just wants a shot at Tsung. Raiden proves to be larger than life as Shang Tsung even seems to fear him. Even secondary characters (and fan favorites) ScorpionSub-Zero, Kitana, and Goro all get introductions that make them feel special. By the time the movie gets going you are ready to see what the fate of all these characters are and how they do in battle.

While it’s not award winning acting or anything I also don’t mind the portrayals of all the primary characters. I find Robin Shou pretty funny at times (especially early on) as Liu Kang, Bridgette Wilson pretty much is Sonya Blade and Linden Ashby plays an annoying Johnny Cage (which is just fine).  Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa went for an over the top performance for Shang Tsung and it’s arguably the 2nd best thing in this film. Tagawa is so good that he’d been asked to reprise the role for Tsung for TV and games in the future (including Mortal Kombat 11, which came out in 2019). Trevor Goodard’s Kano was also so memorable that the character adopted an Australian accent for the games later on. Your milage probably varies with Christopher Lambert’s Raiden. I’m a fan of the raspy voice with some sarcasm thrown in. The only miss really is Talisa Soto’s Kitana, which is as wooden as it gets.

shang tsung
Shang Tsung was played perfectly by Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa.

The fight scenes are the make or break for Mortal Kombat.  Sub-Zero looks awesome in a preliminary fight where he just freezes a guy and he explodes. Liu Kang wins a fight against an unnamed opponent, and Sonya takes out Kano (which oddly takes place rather early in the film). The first great fight takes place as Johnny Cage faces off with Scorpion, which ends with a fantastic Easter Egg. But then it once again slows down to a crawl to which we are just waiting for the fights with Goro and Shang Tsung himself. Kang vs. Kitana is a waste of time and Kang vs. Sub-Zero is disappointing. Shang Tsung’s had enough though, and Goro starts wasting people left and right (including Art Lean, a random character thrown in who I’m guessing was just here to take a “meaningful” loss to Goro). For 1995 the effects used for Goro are actually pretty cool. Johnny Cage challenges Goro and the fight itself is entertaining but admittedly disappointing. It’s mostly played for a joke, yet it’s memorable (I can still recite Cage’s line about his sunglasses). It’s cool to see Goro outsmarted like that, but also disappointing as this was supposed to be the sub-boss to Shang Tsung. If we went straight to Tsung here I probably would be disappointed overall.

Scorpion tries to “TOASTY” Johnny Cage.

Here’s where effort and a love for the franchise come into play to tilt Mortal Kombat into the positive. Throughout the film a cgi lizard that Tsung calls “Reptile” pretty much antagonizes Liu Kang anytime he gets close to Kitana. What a good way to pay tribute to Reptile, the secret character from the first game and a wonderful Easter Egg. But it doesn’t stop there. As Liu Kang and Johnny Cage chase Tsung (who had captured Sonya) into Outworld…Reptile makes one last appearance, only this time he comes out as the full character and it’s absolutely awesome to this day. The fight between Liu Kang and Reptile more than makes up for the Goro gaffe (it also led to a couple of broken ribs for Shou). It’s also the one of the only things I remember seeing as a kid in the movie theater itself. Keith Cooke, the actor who plays Reptile, also has a unique moving style that made Reptile feel special. When the film needed a big moment before the end, it delivered. Kang vs. Tsung is a fine finish as well. We do get a teaser for a sequel at the very end, but no doubt that Mortal Kombat finished strong.

One last thing to mention. I don’t know if overall the film had good cgi for 1995, but it doesn’t look terrible. The soundtrack of course is one of the greatest movie soundtracks of all-time. Just listen to Liu Kang vs. Reptile’s battle theme (an instrumental of Traci Lords’ “Control”). Amazing.

Best Scene: Well obviously it’s the entirety of Liu Kang vs. Reptile. Not even close really. If you never watch the movie just watch this!

Worst Scene: Shang Tsung capturing Sonya Blade is a bit lazy to get to the end.

Final Thoughts: While some contenders have come out in recent years, I’m still perfectly fine with calling this the greatest video game movie adaptation ever. It wouldn’t be my pick anymore, but I wouldn’t argue against it. If you aren’t a big fan of the games or were into Mortal Kombat for the gore then you probably don’t care for this. Otherwise, it’s a lot of fun and you can tell everyone involved cared about the film.

Grade: B

Released: November 21, 1997
First Seen: In Theaters (Near Release Date)
Last Watch: Amazon Prime Video

What has to be considered about the success of the first film is how close it was to being an absolute disaster. Mortal Kombat took care care of it’s characters and as a result got away with some stuff that would be considered bad. Annihilation doesn’t do the same and it suffers as a result.

First thing to note is that a lot of the main characters had been recast. We have new actors/actresses for Sonya, Raiden and Johnny Cage. With Cage is hardly matters, he’s gone in the first five minutes. But with Sonya Blade and Raiden it’s too distracting, especially since James Remar and Sandra Hess are nothing like Christopher Lambert and Bridgette Wilson. Blade’s character specifically seems to be a bland good character now as opposed to the bad ass she was in the first film.  Speaking of changes any personalty Liu Kang showed in the ’95 film is wiped away here for just another bland character.

Remember how everyone in Mortal Kombat was treated as a big deal? That’s not the case here. Now we have characters just thrown at us to either fight or to just exist (poor Rain) just because they existed in the video game universe. The ones that are treated as a big deal: Jade, Sindel, Jax, Shinnok and Shao Kahn each have their own issues as compelling characters. I actually don’t mind Lynn “Red” Williams’ Jax, he’s easily the most entertaining of the good characters even if he’s making jokes about how ridiculous the world is. His “lesson” is just dumb. Jade ends up just being a throw-away.

One of the lamest set of generals ever

Let’s quickly just get to one of the two biggest offenses in this film. The first is the whole Shao Kahn-Sindel-Shinnok (and Raiden) arc. I wrote about how Mortal Kombat had a simple story, which is why it worked out so well. Here we have to justify why Kahn (Tsung’s emperor from the first film that was mentioned) was able to break the rules and invade Earth even though his forces lost the 10th Mortal Kombat. Well, the legend is that Queen Sindel (Kitana’s mother) is the key to keeping the portal open. So if they reunite Sindel and Kitana, perhaps the portal will close. That alone would perfectly be fine and simple. But no, it turns out the legend is a lie. So we waste 75% of the film on the Sindel/Kitana reuniting plan and then it’s suddenly revealed that Raiden and Shao Kahn are brothers and their father, Shinnok, is an Elder God. This twist was horrible for two reasons. One, that’s not how it worked in the games so this didn’t appease fans. Two, it comes up completely out of nowhere. Worst yet, viewers KNOW that Sindel/Kitana isn’t the key, because Shinnok tells Kahn early in the film that he broke the rules to keep the portals open. Horrendous all around.

There’s nothing to save the film either. Kahn’s actor, Brian Thompson, went the over-the-top route but absolutely pales in comparison to Shang Tsung in the ’95 film. Worst yet, Shinnok existing neuters the character anyway. There’s exactly one memorable fight scene in Scorpion vs. Sub-Zero (with Keith Cooke as Sub-Zero this time so that makes him 2 for 2). Storyline wise that’s a bit of a mess too. Special effects also range from alright to laughable. There’s a moment where Raiden pops out of the sky with no theatrics whatsoever and I can’t help but laugh. Speaking of laughing, just try to take the animality part of Shao Kahn vs. Liu Kang seriously, just try.

How could anyone take this seriously

Some of the fights overall are okay to even good, but they don’t have the same effect they did in ’95. Kahn vs. Raiden is short but cool. Scorpion and Sub-Zero is fun, but both characters are nobodies in this film. Sub-Zero’s story is especially butchered as he’s the younger  brother of Sub-Zero (which is good), but Noob Saibot shows up later as a throw-away (who is supposed to be the original Sub-Zero). It’s stuff like that which alienates fans. Cyrax and random warriors vs. Jax and Sonya is also fun (and Sonya gets a good Easter Egg in at the end with a fatality). But after that I don’t care about any of it. Liu Kang vs. Baraka is whatever (speaking of lazy, watch Rain and Baraka’s death scenes and tell me if you see something similar). Raiden fights three Reptiles for some reason. Sheeva dies when a cage falls on her. Sonya faces off with Mileena (the biggest waste of the film, as this is Kitana’s half-sister) in a mud fight which is completely insulting (and even from a movie perspective, she doesn’t have a mark of mud on her a scene later). As for the final battles Jax vs. Motaro is alright, I don’t care about Sonya vs. Ermac/Saibot, Kitana vs. Sindel is boring and we already laughed at Kahn vs. Kang.

This film sucks and everyone knew it. There was supposed to be a third film with Quan Chi and it got scrapped because of this mess. When you have a delicate franchise and don’t take delicate care of the characters, this is what happens.

But the music is pretty good! Make sure to listen to Panik Control! (Raiden vs. Three Reptiles theme).

Best Scene: Has to be Scorpion vs. Sub-Zero. It’s not better than Scorpion vs. Cage or Reptile vs. Kang from ’95 but we don’t have a lot to work with.

Worst Scene: Raiden revealing that Shao Kahn is his brother. Horrible.

Last Thoughts: There’s potential with a Mortal Kombat story for sure. But not everyone is going to like these characters. And if you alienate the fanbase, you know, the people who do like these characters, then you’re left with nothing. The music and some decent fights save this from F but it was close.

Grade: D